Friday, January 7, 2011

Things I have learned about being pregnant

I swear this blog will not turn pregnancy on you.  But it is kind of consuming my thoughts lately, so you might get stuck with it once in a while.  I promise to warn you so you can skip right over, m'kay?

So I have read a lot of pregnancy blogs, and blogs where people got knocked up, and I have 3 nieces and have been very active in their lives.  I felt like I had a *good* idea of what to expect.  And mostly I have been ok, but let me tell you there are things I never knew about.

1. The no allergy medicine.
Seriously, WTF?  I can't breathe.  I am sneezing constantly.  It happens to be mountain cedar time and on a scale of 1 to 10, I am about a 12 on allergic to MC.  And grass, which basically means there is no off-season for my sinuses. 

2. The acne
Oh Em Geezlouise, my skin.  Not to brag too much, but I have always had pretty good skin.  People remark on my skin all the time.  Apparently I had no idea how good I had it because 29 years of minor acne has come back to explode ALL OVER MY BODY.  I am gross. B offered to buy me a massage, but I would feel too guilty that someone would have to touch that.  Gross.  Oh, and the fancy Neutrogena Skin ID I was in love with?  Can't use it because it has Salicylic Acid in it. Or benzoil peroxide, which is a no-no.  But seriously, if you are looking for a product to clear your non-pregnant skin, I highly suggest Neutrogena Skin ID... great stuff.

3. Pregnancy Tests are not all or nothing
So I joined a pregnancy/baby site about the time we started attempting this whole process.  This is where I learned more about my cycle than I have ever known before. I also learned there are commonly used acronyms such as BD (baby dance) and POAS (pee on a stick).  I find BD creepy, but think POAS is hilarious.  I don't know why. 
I digress. Did you know that just because you don't see a second line on a pregnancy test that you still might, in fact, be pregnant?  You did?  I didn't.  But there are people out there that have skillz in the photo editing scene that can take a pregnancy test that 3 years ago I would have seen and immediately followed up with a "Phew, who wants to go to happy hour?" and after turning the photo kind of glow in the darkish can find a second line.  And these lines turn into positive tests in a few days?  Blew me away.

4. Other pregnant people are really cranky
On this same site is a community board where you can shoot the constipated (yep, another fun fact) sh*t with other baby makers. These people have opinions.  And their opinions are that everything you are doing is wrong.  I hear this phenomenon continues into motherhood, so I guess I should buy a few more pairs of big girls panties that I keep hearing people say to put on.
4.5 In Laws
Also, these same people have an entire board dealing with crazy in-laws and families.  Train Wreck.  And addicting. I highly suggest the next time you find yourself bored and tired of facebook, sign up for baby-center and watch the fireworks.  Unbelievable.

5. Exhaustion/Sympathy Pains
These wouldn't normally go together, but at my house they do.  I have always been a napper.  I love to sleep and have no problem spending a Friday night in bed at 8:30.  Sleep is my favorite hobby.  But man, I have never in my life been this tired.  Luckily B is exhausted too.  It may be due to the hormonal shifts he accuses me of having every day, I don't know what he is talking about, but I am ready for bed early.  He is typically the first to suggest lying down for the evening.  I had to put my foot down Tuesday when he suggested this at 7:12 pm.  In his defense he had no idea what time it was, and had I not looked at my watch, I would have been all over that idea.  He has also been in need of more back rubs lately due to unknown reasons as well as no longer sleeping.  I don't sleep either thanks to the psycho dreams this baby gives me, so I think he has sympathy insomnia.  Which is BS because he can take Ambien and I cannot.

Anyone out there have any other warnings for me?  I think I am handling this pretty good so far, but what do I know.  Apparently I am doing it all wrong anyway!

Happy Friday, and if you get some spare time to nap, please do so with me in mind.  I am trying to stockpile all the sleep I can, even if it isn't MY sleep!


Becky Mochaface said...

Baby dance... That. Is. Awesome.

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